So I've just began my final year at uni and that's screaming alarm bells in my head. Third year = work load bigger than a mountain, not to mention the fact that I'm doing a dissertation project I have very little clue about and will have to plan and carry out my own lab project!! (This coming from a Biology student who pretty much hates labs!)
Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I came to uni - I've met some brilliant friends, had loads of laughs and experiences and I do genuinely love my course (even if it's just the theory I find interesting not as much the practice) - and I've definitely learnt a lot about myself over the past 2 years. The thing is, I think having been home for the 3 month summer, I've gotten used to the old ways and it's made me a bit nostalgic having to leave again. Not only that but I'm terrified of being put back into the working environment where I'm not capable and I'm scared of getting things wrong. I guess I'm remembering all the less fun, lonely, cold and scary times that I've had at uni (and now associate with it) over the past 2 years and I'm wondering whether I'm strong enough to cope another year.
As well as this big, scary 'final year' I'm starting a new part time job that is completely out of my comfort zone and to be honest I'm not sure if I'm capable. It'll be great experience (as is anything) but I'll be working closely with people and I don't want to let them down. This is also going to be alongside a very busy and stressful academic year so I'm getting a bit anxious.
So, sorry about the ramble for a bit of context, the point I wanted to write about is, that over the past two weeks I've been feeling very run down and ill. I'm constantly tired, painful throat, sneezing every 5 sec - achuuu - onds and it often takes everything I can muster to not cry. At first I thought, oh it's just a cold. But since it's lasted for a while now (usually it'll last a week tops) and I'm still feeling really rough, I'm thinking it might be linked to my mental health.
I'm getting the feeling that even though this started out as a simple cold, I'm probably making it much worse and making myself ill by continuing to feed my unhealthy thoughts and worries. And it's probably working in a huge circle so that my health is making me feel bad, therefore feeding these anxious thoughts which are making me feel worse, making my health worse etc etc.
So I guess what I'm trying to put into words is that when we feel ill or get these anxious thoughts, there may be an underlying reason and when this comes out in forms of physical illness, it's your body talking to you. I think then, it's time to take a moment to reflect and try and sort it out.
Here's a few suggestions that I'm giving a go at the moment;
Talking about it to someone. Obvious I know, but often with anxiety/depression, talking to someone - anyone - can give you some perspective and help ease the anxious thoughts.
Meditating/Mindfulness - This is something I've always wanted to do and since I'm about to form a somewhat busy and stressful routine I'm going to include a period of destressing every day and hopefully if I implement this routine addition early I might stick to it.
Yoga - One good thing about coming back to uni is that I can start going to the yoga classes again regularly and I have found in the past that this really helps me feel both relaxed, productive, and healthy.
How are you all feeling at the moment? Do you agree with this? Let me know in the comments;